


That Which Haunts

by aionimica



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, Post Sequel Trilogy, sublight space trips that are waayyyyy too long, that damn hyperdrive, the falcon has issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-24
Updated: 2018-02-24
Packaged: 2019-03-22 10:41:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13762401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aionimica/pseuds/aionimica
Summary: Kylo and Rey are assigned to do a trip from Nar Shadda to Canto Bight, but the Falcon decides to act up in it's most reliable way.





	That Which Haunts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dietplainlite](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dietplainlite/gifts).



> a treat fill for the Reylo Fanfiction Anthology Valentine's Exchange.
> 
> prompt: we've been on this sub-light speed trip for a month and still haven't worked out our issues
> 
> enjoy!

* * *

 

 

There were no doors on the  _ Millenium Falcon _ , a fact Rey discovered only when she wanted to slam one shut. Instead, she was left walking back into the cramped corner where the hyperdrive sparked while behind her, Kylo Ren stood in the middle of the common area with his hands clenched into fists.

“I can assure you this is exactly not how I wanted to spend my day.”

Rey clenched her teeth and averted her gaze. “Believe me, this wasn’t how I wanted to spend this month.”

It was supposed to be a routine jump. Traveling from Nar Shadda to Canto Bight wasn’t a fast trip by any means, but when a routine realspace conversion shattered their hyperdrive connections, a two-day trip turned into twenty-six. 

Rey leaned over the access panels of the  _ Falcon _ for the fourth time that day, as she did every day, doing whatever she could to keep her hands busy otherwise she’d lose her mind. Every day she ran her hands over the shattered technology in the hopes that she’d catch something she missed the day before; distracting herself from her shipmate was only a side benefit.

“That hyperdrive is almost as old as you are,” Rey mumbled, her elbows streaked with grease.

“Older,” he quipped. 

Rey shot him a look and he shrugged. “Bespin was one of Leia’s favorite stories. Han didn’t… remember much,” he said bitterly. 

An uncomfortable silence fell over them as Rey buried herself back into the hyperdrive. She’d heard enough of the stories of Han and Leia and Luke during their Rebel days. Even before she met them, they’d managed to reach Jakku on old datapads and mangled star readers. Kylo didn’t stray far; he came closer, occasionally looking over her shoulder as she asked for a part. 

“Do you know how to fix this ship?” she asked curtly. He closed his open mouth before even getting out the words. It was the twentieth time he almost corrected her as he handed her a coupling while she fiddled with the motivator. His breath was warm against her neck, but his suggestions were not helpful in the slightest. She ground her teeth. “That’s what I thought.”

He said nothing and pulled away, as he did more and more frequently. At first, she thought it was just the proximity and needing his own space, which she was more than happy to give, but when she sat in the pilot’s chair and adjusted their course settings, he would run like a fire at his back. The first time she thought she imagined it, the second time she hoped it was just a fluke and the third? He stopped coming to the cockpit after that. 

Rey stood up, her sudden motion sending him stumbling back, kicking spare parts across the floor. “Alright. I’m not dealing with this for another minute; what is going on with you? Is it me? Did I do something?”

“No--” he sputtered.

“Then what? Do I smell?” The fresher was one of the things desperately needing replacement and upgrades on the ship, and after nearly a month of constant use, it was not in the best shape.

“No!” 

“Then why are you mad at me?” she pressed. 

This route was supposed to be quick and easy, and then the two of them could be back to their routine, back to figuring out whatever was their normal. Rey had even been looking forward to this trip - three days alone with him, with no one walking in unannounced or a bond to see him through. It was just her and Kylo.

But then three days turned into twenty-six and within hours he’d receded into himself, hardly passing her a spare glance, mumbling under his breath as they walked past each other in the corridors. Which was a considerable feat considering that the  _ Falcon’s _ bunk situation had been rearranged over the years with only a supply a couch and the captain's cabin remaining. Nothing more. He gave her the cabin that first day before recoiling from it, visceral disgust on his brow. So much for just her and Kylo. 

Kylo didn’t answer at first, pressing his lips together in that manner of his that chewed over flesh as he did concepts. If she closed her eyes, Rey could imagine those lips against hers, working their way down her skin like they had in endless nightmares and daydreams. Heat flushed her cheeks as Rey glanced away; there were memories and dreams best left in secret places.

“I’m not mad,” he started. “It's just… it’s not important..”

He started to walk away, but Rey stepped forward, tripping over the tools, only catching herself on his outstretched hand. That was how they worked: even when they wanted to fade away, they were there to catch each other. 

His eyes caught her, looking into her and seeing her with clarity that she couldn't begin to comprehend. Even so, she held her breath and stopped him in his tracks.

“No, you don’t get to walk out on me like this, Ben.”

“I can’t go many places,” he said dryly, gesturing about the ship.

“That’s what you think.” 

They both walked away too many times to count, shutting the door on themselves and each other, hiding in crevices and falling into the ether of the Force. The bond between them still stretched, echoing in the corner of their minds, reminding them of what lay just beyond. 

If she knew a way to cut it off completely, Rey wouldn’t hesitate. Instead, it leached into her dreams. She’d find Kylo there and he’d hold her close in her bed while he lay on the couch and she’d fall asleep against his chest to the not-quite-there beat of his heart.

“You did nothing,” he said quickly. “I told you it’s not important.”

Rey scowled and pulled her hand out of his. “It’s important when what’s bothering you falls over to me. You can tell me.”

“Rey…” 

She looked back. He hadn’t moved. Kylo Ren simply stood there and looked into her eyes. At some point in the past years, he traded his heavy black robes for a lighter shade of grey and blue. On this trip, all he had left was his undershirt and a pair of loose pants that shifted slightly as he moved, his muscles coiling underneath.

Some hours she’d lie awake at night and imagine rubbing her hands down his abdomen, his hips against hers as she’d moan into his shoulder. Some nights the dreams became clearer than before and she’d wake up flushed and unsatisfied, running into the fresher to take care of what was left unfinished. 

“I’m not mad, Rey,” he said gently. “I promise.”

There was some part of her that doubted that answer. It was the part of her that hadn’t pressed the issue until now, that was content with a non-answer and just fitting this piece of whatever they were into what she knew of the past: that whatever this was temporary and would fall away at the whims of the universe and she’d be alone. The cycle would start again.

But after everything they’d gone through, with the fall of the First Order and the Republic Remnant gingerly finding truces on their own without much need for a Jedi, it was just her and Kylo, off on their own devices to see the galaxy, working through their messes alone and at times together.

“If anything I’m mad at this damn ship for being too sentimental to everyone in the galaxy to get rid of it.” Kylo reached out and pulled her close, her head falling stubbornly on his chest. He didn’t smell terrible, but neither did he smell great -- neither of them did, if she was being honest, thanks fresher -- but he smelled like him and that was enough for her. “Everywhere I turn I see my mistakes repeated in front of me, replaying before my eyes.”

He leaned forward, resting his chin on the top of her head. “I killed Han Solo and I see his ghost everywhere. I hear him when I close my eyes; I can see my mom and dad walking in and out of that cabin like nothing happened. Did you know you sit in the chair just like he did? Everything I see just reminds me of everything I threw away. And for what? Even the problems that plagued this ship before I was born are haunting me.”

“It’s just a ship, Ben,” she mumbled into his shirt. 

“It’s my father's ship,” he clarified.

The words hung heavy between them before falling to the ground and shattering into a million pieces, unable to be repaired. Loss and lost were not too far from each other: they both had experience with each. But there was blood on Kylo’s hands that burned his skin in their shared dreams at night, a reminder of everything that had come before to bring him to now. 

“I’m sorry,” she said eventually.

“Yeah,” he whispered into her hair, his arms wrapping around her waist. “Me too. For so many things. So many regrets, things I wish I could do differently.”

There was a slight shake to his grasp, an uncertainty in his motions that echoed in their bond. But his sincerity was blatant and clear. That fear that everything would fall to the cycle faded in a moment, determination landing on her brow as she reached on her toes and pressed her lips to his.

It wasn’t their first kiss -- that was a tentative thing that surprised them both just a few short months after Crait -- but here on a ship with just of the two of them and his lips on hers, Rey smiled against his lips and pulled him closer to her. His hips were heavy, his body warm against hers and as she leaned back and opened her mouth, his hands fell to her side, roving against her back -- an anchor looking for a place hold fast. She nipped his lips as her tongue pried him open further. A low moan rose between them, but whether it was from him or her, Rey wasn’t sure. And she didn’t care. 

“Come on,” she said with a hunger growing in her that could only be satiated with the taste of him. Red flooded his cheeks as Rey took his hand and led him away. Kylo followed as she led him to her bed and without a second glance, shut the door behind them.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you all enjoyed!
> 
> i was debating on writing a rated-M ending to this, but I ran out of time. that being said, if this gets enough feedback, i think i'll end up writing it ;) so let me know your thoughts.


End file.
